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If you think of it, in terms of how many people there are in Black Hollywood, the numbers just don’t add up. It’s like that hashtag that’s going around, #oscarssowhite; I’d say #blackhollywoodsostraight."Growing up, did you struggle with coming out and accepting yourself?
"You know, I’ve always loved the skin I was in, even before I knew what lesbian or gay was.
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That’s a big part of our foreplay: making sure when she comes home that she’s in a clean house and feels really good. People think sex only happens when people get naked, but it really starts when your partner gets home and when you’re doing things to get them in a really sexy place."Also, as uncomfortable as it is, talk about what you like and what you’re not a fan of.
I always do this after sex, and my girlfriend’s always like, ‘Why do we have to have right after sex?
After that, we’d bump into each other here and there. She and I bump into each other at a mutual friend’s 30th birthday party.
We danced a little bit, but again, I didn’t think anything of it — I dance with straight girls all the time.
Since I really liked her and I thought she was giving me vibes, I called the restaurant we were at and asked them which wine she had ordered, so I could buy it for her. If I was wrong, I’d say, ‘Hey, it’s just a friendly gesture.’ But if I was right, it was my way of saying, ‘Yo, I like you, too.’ Ultimately, I saw her at the housewarming and she looked glorious. Then, when we got into the car, I gave her the wine and we’ve been together ever since."Do you think we're moving away from a binary conversation about sexuality, where there's only gay and straight, and into a more nuanced understanding of sexuality? I love the fact that I can say to people that my girlfriend used to be a full-blooded heterosexual woman. People always go: 'Oh, so she was closeted all of those years? Not at all.' She just took a liking to me and wanted to try dating me.
I’m the first serious, adult relationship she’s ever had. I think there are a lot of people who have thought about being with the same sex, but they’re like, "People will ask my girlfriend, ‘Alana, are you gay? ’ For a second, she was trying to figure out, ‘Am I a lesbian? I’m just going to be myself.’ I think it’s interesting that we can say, ‘Look, sexuality is fluid and love is where you find it.’ "I love that our love story exists, because there are a lot of love stories like ours.
So, the biggest piece of advice I would give is to really listen to your partner.
When you’re making love to them and you do something that they really like, they’ll react or make a sound.
I’ve always found that being unique and being different was cool.
My gayness, my Blackness, my gender, even the way I wear my hair, I think all of those things make me special.
Being gay is just one of them."There's a great episode of where your character, Denise, is trying to hook up with a coworker who's straight.